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When, all of a sudden he caught a glimpse of himself in the handlebar mirror and became so... aroused by it that he burst his Speedo shorts portland which then got caught in the gears and threw him right on his face. Splatter. Mimi: I take it you know that D.H. is your father? Igby: No. Mimi: Then I'm really glad I told you. Igby: Russell. I need a portland job. Sookie: Dimebag... well that got your portland attention. Igby: Pavlov's pothead... I hear the sound of a bong clink and my eyes begin to water. Sookie: That's funny. [Igby returns from military school] Igby: Turtle. He was my best buddy. Then his rifle backfired and blew his face off. We all learned a valuable lesson about weapon maintenance that day. Mimi: Why didn't the school inform me? Igby: It wasn't the school's fault. They were great about it, paid for the dry cleaning and everything. Not because they had to, but because it was the right thing to do. Jason Slocumb: You see it, Igby? I feel this great, great pressure coming down on me.
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