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Can't wait for you suicidegirls to visit again, losers.Hey Formerly Hot Girl Who Is Getting Fat,Here that faint ticking sound in the background of your life? That’s your little indication that your time is almost up. No amount of forcing those wider hips in your college pants will make us suicidegirls all burn with envy and lust like we used to. It’s over. Time to hang up the belly suicidegirls shirts, join Curves, and find yourself one of those guys you used to be mean to and marry him, because Joe Six-Pack is dating the assistant in the office (see above).No, Seriously, The Guys Really Value What You Have To SayWe watch you count the calories, deny yourself the pizza and spin yourself into a fit of tears to get your ass from expanding any bigger, but nothing will spike your metabolism. You’re irritable, frustrated and chubby. All in all, former hot girl, you’re becoming a fat bitch.
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