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| cathy moriarty, humor, eaton centre, bernard nezmah, bulletin board, quotations, lounge, avclub, tyee.ca, pot shirts, writers, interviews, s, wave sound files, frank adonis, cuban, ecards, fuckwikipedia encyclopedia reference, | DEREK: Oh-h. CLIVE: You were saying, when africa I was born ..... DEREK: Yes, when you were born you were a very happy boy. You were three stone nine ounces. And, er, you were a very healthy bouncing boy with a HU-, with a-, no. And, well, you had a normal childhood, africa erm ..... CLIVE: Did I have many friends? africa I can't remember having any friends. DEREK: Oh, no, no, you didn't like people. No, you kept very much to your self. I disciplined you, you see. You, you had this, er, this huge wart - it had to be removed by degrees. CLIVE: Wh-, wh-, where did I have a wart, Mother? DEREK: Mm-mm, huh, ohh! You had it on your winkie. You had it on your little ticket. I used to call your, your, um, winkie your ticket. I said, "Let me punch your ticket!" and you never did. |
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| Oh, 'scuse me. Gg-gg-gr-rr-rrr (laughs) oh-ho-ho, oh-ho, ohhh (laughs longer) CLIVE: Mother ..... DEREK: (continues laughing) I'm sorry, dear, I've just had a vision. I remember your father when he went down in the toilet. s Do you remember when he went- (laughs) CLIVE: I wasn't born when father went down the toilet, Mother. As I s remember it from the newspaper clippings, you were, er, accused of throwing him down the toilet. DEREK: NO-THAT-WASN'T-TRUE!!! That was not true. I'd never touch your father in the toilet. I left his toilet s area completely alone. CLIVE: Well, I just read ..... DEREK: Never touched him there. No, anyway, coming back to you as a child. AARRGGGHHH!!! I was, erm-mm-, you were a very happy boy. CLIVE: Mmm. DEREK: I remember when you were born, you were born, you were born on Primrose Day. You were-, you presented me as your hot cross bun. CLIVE: Hm. DEREK: Ha-ha-ha! I said, "FUCK OFF!!" But, that was because I was hysterical. Sorry, dear. CLIVE: 's quite all right, Mother. |
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